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Author Topic: New evaluations & informational pages at The LED Museum  (Read 80059 times)
The_LED_Museum
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« Reply #460 on: August 19, 2012, 07:11:32 AM »

New evaluation: Deck Marker Light





http://www.ledmuseum.candlepower.us/38/jenedml.htm

COMMODORE BASIC V7.0 122365 BYTES FREE
   (C) 1986 COMMODORE ELECTRONICS LTD.
              (C) 1977 MICROSOFT CORP.
                 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

READY.
LOAD"BUTT-HEAD 49",8,8:SYS52224,49,49,7

SEARCHING FOR BUTT-HEAD 49
LOADING

----------------------------------------------------------------------------
SEX ED WEEK...WE'RE GONNA BE TALKING ABOUT THE PENUS...WE'LL BE TALKING ABOUT
THE VAGINA...DO YOU THINK THAT'S FUNNY BUTT-HEAD? DO YOU FIND IT AMUSING THAT
WE'LL BE TALKING ABOUT THE TESTICLES? YES, WE'RE ALSO GONNA BE TALKIN' ABOUT
VENEREAL DISEASE...SEXUAL INTERCOURSE...THE SCROTUM...THE CLITORUS...AND...AND
WE'LL DEFINITELY BE SPENDING A LOT OF TIME TALKIN' ABOUT MASTURBATION!!!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------
READY.



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« Reply #461 on: August 21, 2012, 07:50:43 AM »

New evaluation: Motion-Sensing Deck Light





http://www.ledmuseum.candlepower.us/38/jenemsdl.htm

*** COMMODORE BASIC 4.0 ***

 31743 BYTES FREE

READY.
LOAD"Q-WHO",8

SEARCHING FOR Q-WHO
LOADING

READY.
RUN

?SOME TOTAL ASSHAT (A TRUE ENEMABAG) SAW THE PART OF THE STAR TREK: TNG EPIDODE "Q-WHO" WHERE WORF SAYS "A TYPE OF LASER BEAM IS CUTTING THROUGH THE SAUCER SECTION", AND WONDERED WHY HIS P-WHIPPED 447NM 5MW BLUE LASER POINTER COULD NOT CUT THROUGH A METAL DOOR  ERROR IN 36864

READY.




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« Reply #462 on: August 27, 2012, 07:23:34 AM »

New evaluation: Guillows Tuffoam™ P-180 Avanti "Park Flyer" Airplane





http://www.ledmuseum.candlepower.us/40/avanti.htm
Product failed before its maiden flight, so the dreadful "" icon was used.

        **** COMMODORE 64 BASIC V2 ****
 64K RAM SYSTEM  38911 BASIC BYTES FREE

READY.
LOAD"LANTREE",8,8

SEARCHING FOR LANTREE
LOADING

READY.
SYS64759

----------------------------------------
 FROM ST:TNG "UNNATURAL SELECTION"
----------------------------------------
(ALARM SOUNDS, ALARM SOUNDS)
EXTREME CAUTION.
THE USS LANTREE IS QUARANTINED VESSEL
BY ORDER OF STARFLEET COMMAND.
DO NOT BOARD.
----------------------------------------


READY.



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« Reply #463 on: August 31, 2012, 07:25:06 AM »

New informational web page: Digital Pocket Scale





http://www.ledmuseum.candlepower.us/40/scale.htm

*** COMMODORE BASIC 4.0 ***

 31743 BYTES FREE

READY.
LOAD"KRUSTY 7",8,8

SEARCHING FOR KRUSTY 7
LOADING

READY.
SYS63999

?SOME POTHEAD (A TRUE WASTE OF BUNGWIPE) DRESSED UP
AS A LARGE URANATOR (LIKE LENNY ON THE SIMPSONS), HUCKED
A WELL-USED BONG AT A KRUSTY OLD KLOWN, CAUSING
THE KLOWN TO EXAMINE IT AND RATHER LOUDLY EXCLAIM,
"DRUG PARAPHERNILIA?!? I COULD GO BACK TO PRISON
FOR THIS!!!"  ERROR

READY.



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« Reply #464 on: September 01, 2012, 07:33:51 AM »

New evaluation: Enercell Nano Keychain LED Flashlight



http://www.ledmuseum.candlepower.us/40/ecnano.htm

        **** COMMODORE 64 BASIC V2 ****
 64K RAM SYSTEM  38911 BASIC BYTES FREE

READY.
LOAD"BAND NAMES 104",8,8:SYS8192

SEARCHING FOR BAND NAMES 104
LOADING

----------------------------------------
SUCH DOUCHE-TASTIC FRIENDS
STEALING A BONE FROM THE DOG
COFFEE AND CREMATION
MOUNDS OF POO AND ALMOND WASTOIDS
JUVENILE RADIATION CLINIC
SANTA'S LITTLE HARMER
BLINDLY TOUCHING HER BOOBS
SOME BUTTSNOIPE IRONED MY SOCKS
HUSOOS CRISTO EN UNA MULETA!!!
CANCER OF THE SHOWER NOZZLE
----------------------------------------
READY.



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« Reply #465 on: September 03, 2012, 06:51:50 AM »

New informational web page: Greenie Light-Light





http://www.ledmuseum.candlepower.us/40/greenie.htm

*** COMMODORE BASIC 4.0 ***

 31743 BYTES FREE

READY.
LOAD"SIDE EFFECTS 40",8,8

SEARCHING FOR SIDE EFFECTS 40
LOADING

READY.
SYS36864

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SIDE EFFECTS OF METHOUROCHROMETHIAZAPADOCUSATE SODIUM MAY INCLUDE THE FOLLOWING:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
AXILLARY LAVAGE, GASTRIC MICTUIRITION, UNWARRANTED FEAR OF DUST MITES, UNUSUAL
SEXUAL ATTRACTION TO GLOWING EMBERS, ULNAR LACTATION, CEREBRAL SWELLING, AURAL
MITOSIS, CELLULAR LAVAGE, OLFACTORY FURRINESS, MYSTERIOUS BOTTLES OF MASSENGILL
BRAND POST-MENSTRUAL DOUCHE FLOATING IN THE WATER CLOSET, PITUITARY REVULSION,
SCROTAL HIRSUTISM, PATELLAR FLOODING, LOSS OF FINGERPRINTS, LOOSE AUDITORY
CANALS, POSTNASAL HEMMORHAGE, AND BECOMING WORM FOOD OR FLAKED FISH FOOD.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
READY.



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« Reply #466 on: September 04, 2012, 06:39:11 AM »

New evaluation: Luau LED Lantern



http://www.ledmuseum.candlepower.us/40/luau.htm

*** COMMODORE BASIC 4.0 ***

 31743 BYTES FREE

READY.
LOAD"FICTIONAL",8,8:SYS17408

SEARCHING FOR FICTIONAL
LOADING

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
THE PEE SPUDS                                             BRAIDING OUR TOLIETS
TREE INSEMINATOR                                     NEUTERING A PICTURE TUBE
SHAMPOOING A SQUIRREL                         WHEN GOOD PET DOORS...GO BAD!
SUPERZAPPER DISCHARGE                         VACUUMING UP BONG ASHES
TRAPPED...OUT OF MY ELEMENT               THE POTTY SONG
FINISH MY DRINK, DOWN MY SMOKE       WHO'S THE LATE TURD BURGLAR?
SALTY TEETH                                                WE AREN'T THE ROBOTS
SQUEEZE BOOBS!                                        DESTROYING AN ACCORDION FOR CHRIST SAKES
BEELZEMON IS NOT THE BABY DADDY    CLONING WINONA RYDER'S POOP
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
READY.



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« Reply #467 on: September 05, 2012, 07:29:04 AM »

New evaluation: Glow Purple Flashlight (White/Violet LEDs)/Safety Wand/Flasher/Whistle



http://www.ledmuseum.candlepower.us/40/lgwv3.htm

COMMODORE BASIC V7.0 122365 BYTES FREE
   (C) 1986 COMMODORE ELECTRONICS LTD.
              (C) 1977 MICROSOFT CORP.
                 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

READY.
LOAD "POTHEAD TO THE MAX",8,8

SEARCHING FOR POTHEAD TO THE MAX   
LOADING

READY.
SYS16384,123,45,6

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SOME TOTAL BUTT DUMPLING (A TRUE-TO-LIFE WASTOID!) GOT THIS REALLY STRONG URGE
TO GET STONED, SO HE BEAT FEET TO A NEARBY HEAD SHOP, PURCHASED A HOOKAH
AND A WHOLE BUNCH OF BONGS, LOADED 'EM UP, SMOKED 'EM DRY, AND DID THE SAME THING TWO
MORE TIMES BEFORE HE GOT A SERIOUS CASE OF THE MUNCHES, SO HE GRABBED
THE FIRST THING HE LATCHED ONTO -- WHICH WAS A CANISTER OF SANTA FLUSH TOLIET BOWL CLEANER
CRYSTALS...HE WOLFED DOWN A FEW HANDFULS BEFORE HE REALISED WHAT THEY WERE,
TRIED IN VAIN TO PUKE THEM UP, AND RATHER QUICKLY BECAME WORM OR FISH FOOD!!!!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
READY.


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« Reply #468 on: September 07, 2012, 07:12:04 AM »

New evaluation: USB Computer Light





http://www.ledmuseum.candlepower.us/40/usb10.htm

*** COMMODORE BASIC 4.0 ***

 31743 BYTES FREE

READY.
LOAD"KRUSTY 3",8

SEARCHING FOR KRUSTY 3
LOADING

READY.
RUN

?DRESSING UP AS A LARGE URANATOR (LIKE LENNY
ON THE SIMPSONS) AND HUCKING A STAYFREE
PANTY LINER AT A KRUSTY OLD KLOWN, CAUSING
THE KLOWN TO EXAMINE THE OFFENDING ITEM &
RATHER LOUDLY EXCLAIM, "A MENSTRUAL PAD?!?"
ERROR IN  49152

READY.



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« Reply #469 on: September 09, 2012, 06:41:31 AM »

New evaluation: Swivel Flashlight



http://www.ledmuseum.candlepower.us/40/swivelfl.htm

COMMODORE BASIC V7.0 122365 BYTES FREE
   (C) 1986 COMMODORE ELECTRONICS LTD.
              (C) 1977 MICROSOFT CORP.
                 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

READY.
LOAD "STARGATE",8,8

SEARCHING FOR STARGATE   
LOADING

READY.
SYS36864

----------------------------------------------------------------------------
SOME ASSCLOWN (A TRUE WASTE OF BUNGWIPE; A POLLUTANT IN THE GENE POOL) WATCHED
STARGATE:SG-1 ON THE BOOB TUBE, GOT HIS HANDS ON A DHD (DIAL-HOME DEVICE), SET
IT TO TAKE HIM TO THE PLANET DESIGNATED AS P3X667 BUT DIALED "P3X666" INSTEAD, AND
WOUND UP SHAKING HANDS WITH THE DEVIL AND SUBSEQUENTLY BECOMING FISH FOOD.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------
READY.



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« Reply #470 on: September 10, 2012, 06:57:20 AM »

New evaluation: Digital Energy 8xLED Flashlight w/ Laser



http://www.ledmuseum.candlepower.us/40/digitale.htm

COMMODORE BASIC V3.5 60671 BYTES FREE
 3-PLUS-1 ON KEY F1

READY.
LOAD "BAND NAMES 543",8,8

SEARCHING FOR BAND NAMES 543   
LOADING

READY.
SYS32768

----------------------------------------
BLASTING A DOOKIE FOR SCIENCE
TYRANT OF THE AIRWAVES
MOOD RING OF INTOXICATION
THE TVA LIGHT BULB DESTRUCTOR
AFTERBIRTH ON TOAST (THAT'S PIZZA)
JUST GO THROUGH THAT XANAX DETECTOR
SPANKING THE STOVE
NONPHAT REFRIGERATOR
ASTRAL EDDY MICTURITION
----------------------------------------
READY.


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« Reply #471 on: September 11, 2012, 06:58:57 AM »

New evaluation: Green LED Finger "Lite"



http://www.ledmuseum.candlepower.us/40/finglite.htm

*** COMMODORE BASIC 4.0 ***

 31743 BYTES FREE

READY.
LOAD"WARP DAMAGE",8

SEARCHING FOR WARP DAMAGE
LOADING

READY.
RUN

?SOME ROYAL BUTTSNOIPE (A TRUE ASSCLOWN) FOUND A TIME MACHINE, SET IT FOR 10:57AM MDT ON 04-05-2063, STOLE ZEPHRAM COCHRANE'S SHIP "THE PHOENIX", WENT TO WARP, AND CRASHED DIRECTLY INTO PLUTO'S MOON CHARON AND RATHER QUICKLY BECAME GAGH FOOD  ERROR IN 52224
   
READY.




GAGH IS KLINGON FIREWORMS - A KLINGON DELICACY.
IT IS SAID TO BE BEST WHEN SERVED LIVE.


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« Reply #472 on: September 15, 2012, 07:02:29 AM »

New evaluation: Life+Gear Glow Sky Flashlight (White/Blue LEDs)/Safety Wand/Flasher/Whistle



http://www.ledmuseum.candlepower.us/40/lgwsky.htm

*** COMMODORE BASIC 4.0 ***

 31743 BYTES FREE

READY.
LOAD"FICTIONAL BAND NAMES 88",8,8

SEARCHING FOR FICTIONAL BAND NAMES 88
LOADING
READY.
SYS16384

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
GETTING A TRIPLE TWERPECTOMY        YOUR TOASTER DESECRATED MY CRAYONS
A GUPPY CALLED "WENDY"                    (vulgar term deleted) CHRISTMAS
SANTA FLUSH                                               WHO URANATED IN THE DRYER? <NOTE SP.>
IT'S BASSACKWARD                                  TWIST-OFFS LET IN MORE NEON
FAILING TO WATER THE TREE                   VIOLA SOLO!
RESUME YOUR DISORDER                       PHOTONS & FORCEFIELDS?
NASTY CHAINSAW ACCIDENT                   VIOLATING WHOLE GRAIN
SKUNKY GATORAIDE                                   MY WATERMELON IS SQUEAKY
ORANGE JUICE ON THE STOVE                 WHO *REALLY* INVENTED THE MICROPHONE?
THAT COW IS DIZZY                                      OPTICAL INTERCOURSE
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
READY.



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« Reply #473 on: September 18, 2012, 07:04:21 AM »

New informational web page: Videos and data on the INDI-LINK Circuit Monitor



http://www.ledmuseum.candlepower.us/40/indilnk2.htm

COMMODORE BASIC V7.0 122365 BYTES FREE
   (C) 1986 COMMODORE ELECTRONICS LTD.
              (C) 1977 MICROSOFT CORP.
                 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

READY.
LOAD"BUTT-HEAD 77",8,8:SYS52224,49,49,7

SEARCHING FOR BUTT-HEAD 77
LOADING

----------------------------------------------------------------------------
SEX ED WEEK...WE'RE GONNA BE TALKING ABOUT THE PENUS...(DAMMIT THIS (vulgar term deleted) ME
OFF)...WE'LL BE TALKING ABOUT THE PENUS...DO YOU THINK THAT'S FUNNY BUTT-HEAD?
DO YOU FIND IT AMUSING THAT WE'LL BE TALKING ABOUT THE PENUS...YES, WE'RE ALSO
GONNA BE TALKING ABOUT THE PENUS...THE PENUS...THE PENUS...(DAMMIT THIS WUSSY CRAP
IS (vulgar term deleted) ME OFF!)...AND...AND WE'LL DEFINITELY BE SPENDING A LOT OF TIME...
TALKING ABOUT THE PENUS!
(TV:)AND NOW BACK TO...ASBESTOS IN OBSTETRICS!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
READY.



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« Reply #474 on: October 01, 2012, 05:37:25 AM »

New evaluation: PGL RG Portable Laser



http://www.ledmuseum.candlepower.us/40/pgl-rg.htm

This laser had the unfortunate fate of receiving the dreadful rating; not because of the spectacular failure it experienced during testing, but because it has a totally assinine duty cycle rating given the type and thickness of case it has.

        **** COMMODORE 64 BASIC V2 ****
 64K RAM SYSTEM  38911 BASIC BYTES FREE

READY.
LOAD "HAND DRYER",8,8:SYS52224

SEARCHING FOR HAND DRYER   
LOADING

----------------------------------------------------------------------------
SEEN ON AN ELECTRIC HAND DRYER IN THE
1970S AFTER SOME BOGUS (vulgar term deleted) SCRATCHED
OFF SOME OF THE LETTERS WITH A KNIFE
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
WHAT IT READ BEFORE:
PUSH BUTTON. RUB HANDS UNDER WARM AIR.

WHAT IT READ AFTER:
PUS  BUTT    RUB HAND  UNDER ARM
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
READY.



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« Reply #475 on: October 02, 2012, 06:55:35 AM »

New evaluation: INDI-LINK Circuit Current Monitor



http://www.ledmuseum.candlepower.us/40/indilink.htm

        **** COMMODORE 64 BASIC V2 ****
 64K RAM SYSTEM  38911 BASIC BYTES FREE

READY.
LOAD"FICTIONAL BAND NAMES 11",8,8:SYS36864

SEARCHING FOR BAND NAMES 10
LOADING

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
THAT TOOTHPICK PEED IN MY SOCK DRAWER
SHELIAK CORPORATE DOUCHE
WE LIVE IN MOPS
WISHING WELL LAVAGE
HAVING DAIN BRAMAGE
LAMP FLOATING IN A WALL URANATOR
HUMMINGBIRDS ARE BRIE
WHEN THE BULLET HITS THE PHONE
INVISIBLE STORMTROOPERS
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
READY.



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« Reply #476 on: October 03, 2012, 06:43:53 AM »

New evaluation: Orange LED Light String





http://www.ledmuseum.candlepower.us/40/ols.htm

*** COMMODORE BASIC 4.0 ***

 31743 BYTES FREE

READY.
LOAD"SIDE EFFECTS 8",8,8

SEARCHING FOR SIDE EFFECTS 8
LOADING

READY.
SYS64767
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SIDE EFFECTS OF TRETONIN MAY INCLUDE (BUT ARE NOT LIMITED TO) THE FOLLOWING:

SWEATING FEET, CARDIAC LAVAGE, SYMBIOTE REJECTION, EXCESSIVE HUNGER OR THIRST,
WEIGHT LOSS, PALENESS, INJECTION SITE REACTION, SWELLING OF THE WRISTS, TOES, OR
PENIS, PURPLE TINT TO VOMITUS, FECAL ALCOHOL SYNDROME, THYROID URANATION, SCALP
EMESIS, UTERINE DETERGENT, HIGH COLONIC RUPTURE, CELLULAR PEPTIDE CAKE (WITH
MINT FROSTING), ULNAR LAVAGE, FREEZER BURN, AND BECOMING WORM AND/OR FISH FOOD.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
READY.



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« Reply #477 on: October 04, 2012, 06:28:09 AM »

New evaluation: QuiqLiteX Rechargeable (Red/White)



http://www.ledmuseum.candlepower.us/40/quiqx-rw.htm

*** COMMODORE BASIC 4.0 ***

 31743 BYTES FREE

READY.
LOAD"SMELL",8

SEARCHING FOR SMELL
LOADING

READY.
RUN

MASSENGILL BRAND DOUCHES IT'S CLEAR,
YOU CAN SEE THEM WITH YOUR EAR



THERE'S A SHIP CALLED ENTERPRISE,
YOU CAN SMELL IT WITH YOUR EYES


READY.



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« Reply #478 on: October 06, 2012, 07:12:27 AM »

New evaluation: QuiqLiteX Rechargeable (Two white LEDs)



http://www.ledmuseum.candlepower.us/40/quiqx-ww.htm

*** COMMODORE BASIC 4.0 ***

 31743 BYTES FREE

READY.
LOAD"SIDE EFFECTS 40",8,8

SEARCHING FOR SIDE EFFECTS 40
LOADING

READY.
SYS36864

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SIDE EFFECTS OF METHOUROCHROMETHIAZAPADOCUSATE SODIUM MAY INCLUDE THE FOLLOWING:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
AXILLARY LAVAGE, GASTRIC MICTUIRITION, UNWARRANTED FEAR OF DUST MITES, UNUSUAL
SEXUAL ATTRACTION TO GLOWING EMBERS, ULNAR LACTATION, CEREBRAL SWELLING, AURAL
MITOSIS, CELLULAR LAVAGE, OLFACTORY FURRINESS, MYSTERIOUS BOTTLES OF MASSENGILL
BRAND POST-MENSTRUAL DOUCHE FLOATING IN THE WATER CLOSET, PITUITARY REVULSION,
SCROTAL HIRSUTISM, PATELLAR FLOODING, LOSS OF FINGERPRINTS, LOOSE AUDITORY
CANALS, POSTNASAL HEMMORHAGE, AND BECOMING WORM FOOD OR FLAKED FISH FOOD.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
READY.



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« Reply #479 on: October 06, 2012, 07:13:36 AM »

New evaluation: Life+Gear Pink LED Glow Stick+Flasher



http://www.ledmuseum.candlepower.us/40/lgp.htm

        **** COMMODORE 64 BASIC V2 ****
 64K RAM SYSTEM  38911 BASIC BYTES FREE

READY.
LOAD"BAND NAMES 104",8,8:SYS8192

SEARCHING FOR BAND NAMES 104
LOADING

----------------------------------------
SUCH DOUCHE-TASTIC FRIENDS
STEALING A BONE FROM THE DOG
COFFEE AND CREMATION
MOUNDS OF POO AND ALMOND WASTOIDS
JUVENILE RADIATION CLINIC
SANTA'S LITTLE HARMER
BLINDLY TOUCHING HER BOOBS
SOME BUTTSNOIPE IRONED MY SOCKS
HUSOOS CRISTO EN UNA MULETA!!!
CANCER OF THE SHOWER NOZZLE
----------------------------------------
READY.



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gearhounds

March 03, 2014, 07:28:00 AM
Ok winter, we get it- you're not quite finished! Going to end up with 6-8" of the white stuff, and single digits tonight.
 

gearhounds

February 13, 2014, 10:22:41 PM
16" of snow this am- I love my snow blower  Grin
 

nightcrawler

February 08, 2014, 04:41:10 PM
several inches of snow on the ground here...and temps have been below freezing for a week or so.
 

nightcrawler

February 03, 2014, 11:01:16 PM
Took a year, but I'll be publishing an update to FN tomorrow morning.
 

gearhounds

January 21, 2014, 07:28:05 AM
Seems like we're getting ramped up again back east; 6-10 inches of snow predicted with nighttime single digit temps!

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